Dating Someone With a Sick Parent

Taking care of your aging parents requires a lot of physical and emotional effort. When you or your partner have a sick parent, it can put a lot of stress on your relationship.

Since caretaking is often difficult, it’s important that you know how to maintain your relationship with the caregiver.

In situations like this, it becomes very important for you to be patient and have strong communication with your partner. Understanding that your partner is going through a lot of stress and supporting them during this time will be essential to maintaining healthy and happy relationship.

Below are some important tips that will come in handy if you are dating someone with a sick parent

1. Help Him In Dealing With The Stress

When you’re caring for your elderly parents, it’s easy to forget about yourself. With all the caregiving and running around you have to do, it can feel like there’s no time for anything else.

When you’re caring for your elderly parents, it’s easy to forget about yourself. With all the caregiving and running around you have to do, it can feel like there’s no time for anything else.

At this time, you should encourage your partner to take some time for themselves. Taking some time to do things they like and letting go of some of that stress can help prevent challenging situations from becoming too challenging.

Ask him how you can be of any help to him – maybe you can take over his caregiving duties for a day, or you can offer to take care of his kids so that he can take some rest.

If you want him to give his hundred percent to this relationship, he needs to focus his time on self-care. Only when he is emotionally healthy will he be able to put effort into this relationship.

He has a lot of responsibilities on his shoulders, and to cope, he must adopt a healthy lifestyle.

If you notice that he cannot manage the stress that comes with caregiving, advise him to seek help from his other close relatives or contact professional care options.

He also has to be willing with short-term caregiving arrangements for his parents when you two are on vacation.

It’s not hard to find time for a relationship when taking care of your parents. He just needs to be open-minded and understand that having a balanced life is important.

2. Focus On Improving Your Connection With Him

It will be very important for you to have a strong physical and emotional connection with him. And having a strong connection is all about enjoying the little moments in life. Sometimes stress and responsibilities completely consume our minds. We lose the motivation to make efforts in a relationship.

Many times its small things that go a long way in strengthening your bond with your special someone

– Find your shared interest

– Take up a hobby that you both are passionate about

– Make sure to have breakfast or at least a cup of tea together in the morning

– Do something interesting before going to bed – play cards, watch tv, listen to music you both like

– Let him know how much you appreciate him being there for you

– Stay connected through text. Ask him about his day every day

– Plan Dinner dates and vacations

– Make special efforts to celebrate birthdays, anniversaries, and relationship milestones

Taking care of dependent parents requires a lot of time and effort; it is important for you to not get affected when he is not able to devote much time to the relationship.

Maybe you do not go out as often as you’d like to, but when you try to enjoy and cherish every moment you are together, it helps to strengthen your bond with him.

Sharing a special connection with him adds a lot of meaning to you and your partner’s life. Being with you also helps him eliminate the stress he gets from being a caretaker to his aging parent.

When a guy feels heard, loved, and taken care of in a relationship, he feels encouraged to put in more effort. 

3. Maintain Healthy Communication

Maybe you do not have anything important to talk about with your partner. Still, it will help if you maintain good communication with him. Take out time to check out on him every day.

Have healthy conversations with him before going to bed – ask him about his day, – tell him if anything funny happened to you at work, and talk about the vacation you both have been planning for so long. Focus on forming a habit of communicating with your SO regularly.

Having good communication in a relationship makes your partner feel heard and taken care of. If you sense that things are a bit off between you and him, ask him directly if he needs anything rather than assuming things. Control your temptation to be a mind reader; it is best if you can ask him directly. You can start by saying – 

“ you seem a bit overwhelmed with the way things are going with your parents; please let me know if there’s anything that I can do to make things better.”

The key to healthy communication is active listening. When your partner feels heard in the relationship, it makes him feel more secure.

Being a good listener requires a lot of patience. When he is talking to you about something important, you must make him feel understood. This encourages him to open up more about issues close to his heart.

People who are bad at listening will always wait for the other person to finish so they can communicate their point.

When you hear your partner saying that he is working really hard these days, your response should be like – “I agree, you really look overworked”.

To be a good listener, you need to ask good questions. Your actions should make your partner feel compelled to come to you when they need anything. Let him know that you have this back. Tell him that you’ll always be there for him.

4. Accept The Fact That He Will Not Be Always Available To You

When your boyfriend has to take care of his aging parents, it will be better for you to have reasonable expectations from him. Sometimes, he won’t be available to you when you need him the most. Therefore it will be wise to have reasonable expectations for your relationship with him.

Dating a guy who has sick parents requires a lot of patience and flexibility. Sometimes dates can get cancelled, vacations will get rescheduled, and he won’t even feel like going out with you.

In these circumstances, it is natural for you to feel that your boyfriend is always preoccupied due to the situation with his parents. If you want this relationship to be satisfying and rewarding, you will have to accept him with an open mind.

5. Try To Gain More Understanding About His Parent’s Health Condition

If you have just started dating him, it would be good to learn more about his parent’s health condition. 

When you know more, it helps you to be more supportive of him. It will also help you prepare for what to expect in the future.

Taking care of your old parents will require you to spend a lot of time with them. If you have a full-time job, it will be difficult for you to give more time to your special someone. And when you fail to put in similar efforts in a relationship, things become a little sour.

When your old parents are going through health problems, it sometimes brings out the worst in them. They may become less understanding about what you are going through. It is normal for them to become a bit controlling and aggressive in a situation like this.

They will not appreciate you not giving your hundred percent of your time to them. They may also face problems excepting your new romantic partner into the family.

It is not impossible to have a meaningful relationship with someone with a sick parent. All you need to do is 

– Have revised expectation

– Be more patient and open-minded

– Be more understanding

– Help him manage his stress

– Be there for him

– Make him feel loved, respected, and accepted

– Spend Quality time with him



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