Q-My husband always makes it a point to shoot down my ideas. It is really frustrating when he disagrees with everything I say. Whenever I’m trying to give an opinion or suggest an idea, he can’t seem to resist the urge to disagree.
But when his friend or family member gives the same solution, he will actually listen and agree with them. He’s happy to take anyone’s advice and not mine.
This might look like a minor issue as compared to other people’s problems, but it is getting really frustrating and irritating for me.
If your partner always shoots down your ideas, it can be a big red flag for you. If left unaddressed, issues like this can do irreparable damage to your relationship.
When your partner stops listening to your opinions and thinks they are always right, it is important to discuss this with them and let them know how their behavior is affecting you.
When you see him always putting you down, it can indicate that you’re dealing with an abusive and selfish partner. If he is actually an abusive person, it can make things very difficult for you. In a situation like this, you must tread carefully and look at things from a broader perspective before jumping to conclusions.
If you see your partner always shooting down your ideas, it could be because he has stopped loving you
When he stops loving you, it will feel like your relationship with him is deteriorating day by day. Men usually don’t outright tell you when they stop loving you, and this is especially the case if they still have some feelings left for you.
Earlier, he was the man of your dreams, but now he has started to become distant. It would be wrong to think that it happened overnight; in fact, it’s a gradual long-drawn process. In the early stages of the relationship, you used to talk with each other for hours every day, but now he doesn’t speak with you until it’s necessary.
You get a strong feeling that the relationship is about to come to an end.
Seeing him always shooting down your ideas makes you feel he has stopped respecting you. And, because he doesn’t respect you, he doesn’t respect your opinion.
Mutual respect and acceptance are an integral part of every relationship. If he doesn’t respect you or your opinions, it will be difficult for you to have a meaningful long-term relationship with him.
When he respects you, it makes you feel safe and appreciated in the relationship. On the other hand, when there is no respect, the partners will often feel dissatisfied, angry and resentful.
Your partner can disrespect you in many ways, but it will always have the same outcome. When he always shoots down your ideas or when he is rude, arrogant and uncaring, breaking up with him may seem like the best course of action. But, sometimes, being honest and conveying your feelings to him can inspire him to make positive improvements.
He has started taking you for granted
Relationships are never easy. They require a lot of effort, respect and appreciation. If you want your relationship to succeed, both of you must be on the same page regarding acceptance, respect and honesty.
Often times in a relationship, your husband or boyfriend may start to take you for granted. His behavior will many times make you feel disappointed and frustrated. You wonder what you have done that is making your partner behave this way with you.
His behavior makes you feel that you are no more an equal in this relationship. It doesn’t matter what you say; he will make it a point to disagree with you.
Not appreciating and valuing you enough indicates that he doesn’t feel encouraged to express his love, appreciation and gratitude towards you.
Even if you are a very selfless and giving person, you’ll still expect him to express a little love and appreciation for you. But, when you see him always trying to belittle you and shooting down your ideas, you feel suffocated and trapped in the relationship.
If you find yourself stuck in a situation like this, it will be important for you to take a step back and look at the situation from a broader perspective. Feeling helpless and jumping to conclusions will do more harm than good.
Why is he taking you for granted?
1. He is very Controlling
If your partner is very controlling, it can make your life a living hell. Maybe you don’t want to end this relationship and are trying your best to keep things running. But, this comes at a cost. His controlling behavior will constantly make you feel guilty and powerless.
A controlling partner will always try to take charge of every aspect of your life. He will always disagree with you and will discourage you from making any decision in the relationship. Living with a partner like this will make you feel trapped, helpless and totally out of control.
2. You Are Too Much in Love With Him
When you go at length to express your love to him, he may begin to take you for granted. Because you are too much in love with him, he starts to feel too secure in the relationship.
In the back of his mind, he always thinks that no matter what, you will never leave him. If you can relate yourself to this situation, it is time for you to rethink about the future of your relationship. You have to make him know how his lack of effort and discouragement makes you feel.
3. You Are Very Adjusting
All of us have been taught about the importance and benefits of being nice to others. As a result, we always try our best to be nice and adjusting with people close to us. In relationships, many of us always try to be supportive, accepting, positive and helpful to our partner. But, when you are always very adjusting and nice to him, he may start to take you for granted.
Some of us try to be nice to others so that they like and accept us. But, in the process, we try to hide our true feelings. And, when you don’t open up with your partner and don’t let out your feelings, in a way, you are allowing him to control your life.
In a relationship, sometimes it becomes very important for you to take a stand for yourself and convey to your significant other about things you are going through. When you see him always shooting down your ideas, let him know how it is affecting your mental peace.
4. You Allow Him to Rule Your Life
When you are too weak before him, he’ll feel encouraged to take you for granted. Many of us become too dependent on our partners for our happiness. As a result, they get all the power to make us angry, happy or sad.
5. You lack self-confidence
When your confidence levels are at your lowest, it allows others around you to dominate your life. There can be many reasons behind your low confidence levels. It could be because of his abusive nature, his dominating attitude or trauma from your past relationship. If you want to live a peaceful and fulfilling life, you must focus on getting your confidence level back. Focus on self-care and if you think you need professional help, don’t hesitate; just go for it.
6. Speak with your partner to fix the situation
If you think your partner is not giving you the respect and appreciation you deserve, it is very important for you to open up with him regarding this issue.
If your boyfriend or husband always shoots down your ideas and is always trying to prove you wrong, it can have a long-term negative effect on your mental health. It will stop you from having a fulfilling and satisfying relationship with him.
Strong communication is key to a healthy relationship. Effective communication occurs only when both the partners feel heard in a relationship. When we feel heard in a relationship, it gives us a sense of security that our significant other respects and understands us. On the other hand, when he always shoots down your opinions and ideas, you start to feel neglected and ignored.
Addressing these issues in a timely manner is very important otherwise, it can develop a lot of resentment between the two of you.