The Ideal Age Difference in Relationships for Success

Experts believe that there is a lot in common between Age and Love. When the age gap is high, irrespective of who is older and who is younger, both men and women face an onslaught of negative opinions from people around them. They think their relationship is inappropriate because of the age gap.

The couples may have strong reasons to be together; they may feel they have strong compatibility. Still, many scientific researchers in this field have discovered that the high age-gap relationships usually don’t last.

The age gap of more than ten years might often create many relationship problems down the line, but is there any ideal age gap for having a successful relationship?

As per science, there is an ideal age gap that can increase your probability of having a successful and meaningful relationship.

People who have been in past relationships already know that there is no exact recipe for a perfect relationship. The success or failure of a relationship is majorly dependent on factors like honesty, trust, respect, and level of communication between the couple.

Numerous other factors contribute to the long-term success of a relationship. As you know, the best things in life don’t come easy; relationships and love are no exception; you have to put in the hard work.

What Science Says About Age-Gap?

Researches from the National University of Singapore and Emory University in Atlanta conducted studies on marriage duration. They discovered that the more the age gap between the partners more are the chances of them splitting up.


In other words, when there is a narrow age gap between a couple, there are higher chances for the relationship to succeed in the longer run.

In many cases, researchers found that when the age gap is high, there are 30 percent more chances of a couple splitting up as compared to a relationship where there is no age gap.

Researchers did these surveys on more than 3000 couples (married and recently divorced) during the study. As stated above, they found a higher likelihood of a divorce when there is a wider age gap between the married couple.

Similarly, a study in the Journal of Population Economics also indicated a reduced marital satisfaction in couples with a wider age gap than couples of almost the same age.

When the age gap is between 0-3 years, the couples were more satisfied in comparison to those with a four-six years age gap. Similarly, those with four-six years age gap showed better satisfaction than couples with a more than seven years age gap.

One possible premise behind this theory is that differently aged couples struggle to show required resilience when the relationship hits a rough patch because of illness, financial reasons, or other factors.

How big of an age gap is too big?

Many studies have found that if the age gap between you and your special someone is more than five years, you have 18% higher chances of splitting up. Similarly, if the age gap is more than ten years, there is a 39% higher chance of a failed relationship.

The couples with around 20 years of age gap have 95% more chances of failing in the relationship than couples with almost no age gap.

The Counterpoint

The important thing to consider is that the success of relationships doesn’t depend on statistics; every relationship is different in its way. Statistics don’t consider factors like lifestyle, communication, backgrounds, expectations, compatibility, common interest, long-term goals, etc.

Happiness in a marriage or a relationship depends on numerous factors; it is difficult for any study to account for these aspects.

If you find someone you think you connect well with, it will not be suitable to reject them solely based on your age gap.

But for someone struggling with their wide age-gap relationship where they find it challenging to connect with their partner, these statistics might help them make the right decision.

Things to Consider Before Committing.

If you see yourself falling for someone who you think is a perfect match for you, it is understandable that you will find it difficult to leave them just because of the age gap between you two.


As it is said, maturity is relative; it doesn’t always come with age. A meaningful relationship is all about having mutual love & respect, acceptance, empathy, commitment, and positivity.

Before making any major commitment, you must try to answer these questions to ensure that you are on the same page with your partner.

-Your Future plans

Plans related to Careers, children, jobs, Location, or other probable life events, whatever you have planned for your life, you must try to find out if you both are on the same page with these plans.

If not, ask your self will you be able to compromise on them easily? It would help if you had an honest conversation with your SO before Committing.

– Values and morals
You are planning to have a relationship with them, of course, you think they have a good nature. But you must dig deeper.

Can you think of any sensitive subjects (beliefs, pollical and religious views) that may cause problems between you two in the future?

Having an honest discussion now to know where you two stand on these topics will not be a bad idea.

–  Common Interests 

When you have Common interests and Shared hobbies, it strengthens the bond between you two. When you grow older, and the wider age gap between you two creates distance, your shared interests will help you maintain a better connection in challenging times.

– Compromise 

One thing that both the partners in a relationship should learn sooner than later is – how to compromise. When you are together, there will be a lot of disagreements; you don’t have to agree to everything that your partner does or say.

To have a successful relationship, you need to create a balance between where you should compromise and where you should not.

If you learn the skill of managing compromises, you will have a meaningful relationship where you can solve disagreements without hurting your partners’ feelings and pushing them away.

Before committing, you have to analyze if you will be able to compromise with your special someone, especially when they are at a different stage of life than you are.

When you are in a wide age-gap relationship, people around you will have many negative opinions. It would help if you prepared yourself to experience negative bias. If you are amongst those who are less resilient towards negative opinions from people around you, it will be hard for you.

Like any other relationship, speaking to each other by being open and honest is the best method to plan for the future.

Try to figure out ways to prevent your age gaps from creating any friction between you two in the future.

You must consider the fact that you both will always be at different stages of life in the long run, and there is nothing wrong with that. Strong communication, mutual love, and respect will go a long way in reducing the distance created by age gaps.



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