Boyfriend Tells Me What I Can and Can’t Wear – What To Do?

One of the most difficult topics for a lot of women is their wardrobe. Whatever they decide to wear, everyone around will have some opinion about it.

Some people will always appreciate how you style yourself, while others will criticize it.

 If your boyfriend is always trying to tell you what to wear, it may be a sign that they’re too controlling.

Never allow anyone to control how you live your life and what you wear, even if he is your boyfriend or husband.

There is a big difference between respecting your partner and allowing him to control your life. Women who fail to understand this difference often struggle in their relationship.

You have a personal life and are entitled to make independent choices for your own good.

It is not right to  feel guilty or bad about what you are wearing just because your boyfriend might not approve of it. You should always wear something that makes you feel good and confident.

When you have a controlling boyfriend, you will always see him criticizing your wardrobe even though he seemed to like it in your initial dating days. It indicates that he is being overprotective in a very unhealthy way.

Below you will find some important tips on how to deal with the situation where your boyfriend tells you what to wear.

1. Understand that You Are Not a Pushover

You have always liked to dress in a particular way; you have your own style and are passionate about looking awesome every day. 

Your partner always knew about your style of dressing. And now that you have been together for a long time, it is not right on his part to fuss about it and try to control what you wear.

If this is such a huge deal for him, he should have addressed it before you were already in a relationship. If he was uncomfortable with your style from the beginning, why didn’t he mention his concerns earlier on?

Now that your relationship has grown into something more serious, it is wrong for him to impose more control over your fashion choices. It is important to not let your partner dictate his terms over you. Remember, your style and dressing are a part of your identity; it’s a part of who you are.

2. Acknowledge Yourself For Who You Are

You got into a relationship to add more meaning and value to your life, to give yourself more strength. You expect your partner to be a strong pillar in your life who helps you achieve more and become a better version of yourself.

But, if you feel that you are forced to compromise on your dignity and personality every day, it is a sign that you live in a toxic relationship.

Your boyfriend is supposed to act as an uplifting force in your life. But, it’s really a big issue when he starts to make you feel that you can’t make good decisions about yourself and tries to impose his decisions on you.

In order to boost your self-confidence, you should make it a practice to acknowledge and praise yourself. Identify your strengths and positive attributes. Constantly feed yourself with positive thoughts about yourself. Doing all this will make you physically and emotionally stronger.

Your mindset deeply influences your emotions, thoughts, and behavior.

Remember that it’s your life, and you shouldn’t give up on your personality, dignity, and dreams, even for your special someone.

Never allow your partner to control your heart, body, and thoughts. By doing this, not only are you giving up control over your life, but you are also opening yourself up for a lot of pain.

If you can get past the idea that nobody owns you and nothing dictates your life, then you will be on top of things.

3. Tell Him That You Don’t Like Him Telling What to Wear

It is not a great experience when your boyfriend tries to dictate your life. Sometimes, Just speaking up about what worries you might help him change his mind.

Some guys always try to make the relationship more meaningful by adding more effort of their own. They are always open to your suggestions on how to improve things with the two of you. If your partner falls in to this category, then speaking up with him about your concerns makes the most sense.

When discussing a difficult topic like this, it is important to choose the right time and atmosphere.

4. Set Clear Boundaries

Some guys have the tendency to try and take control of the relationship in their own hands. They will constantly discourage you from making your own decisions. If you don’t set healthy boundaries for each other, it might create a lot of problems in your relationship later down the line.

Having healthy boundaries means he should not try to control what you can and can’t wear. This is particularly in the case if there is nothing wrong with your style and dressing.

Healthy boundaries ensure strong, satisfying relationships.

If you compromise too much, it is going to negatively impact your mental health.

There is no problem in making healthy compromises to make a relationship succeed. 

Making good compromises strengthens trust, security, and accountability in a relationship. Making compromises indicate that both of you have a common goal in mind. It indicates that you both want to have a lasting, satisfying and meaningful partnership.

But when you make too many compromises, it may make you feel angry, frustrated, and resentful towards a partner.

Making unhealthy compromises means that you are sacrificing your basic needs and desires. As time progresses, this is going to make your life more resentful.

Resentment makes your relationship toxic; it erodes your self-confidence and makes you feel inadequate. It gives you a feeling that you will not be able to meet your needs. You feel you are constantly deprived of the respect and honor you deserve.

Some women think that – boyfriend telling them what to wear is not a big thing. But, in the longer term, it implies that you have developed the habit of sacrificing your own needs and desires. You do this to make your partner feel happy and satisfied.

Rather than always giving in to him, stand up for yourself and let him know that you are not ready to make these many compromises for him.

If he genuinely cares for you, he will respect your individuality. On the other hand, if he is adamant about controlling your life, then you must understand that he doesn’t have your best interest at heart.

5. Understand That You Are Not At Fault Here

When things get tough in a relationship, it’s natural for both the partners to think about what went wrong and who is responsible for the mess. 

It often happens that you start blaming yourself, thinking that you should be more compromising and accommodating for your boyfriend.

But the truth is that you may not be at fault here. It is not practical and healthy to take complete responsibility for everything that goes wrong in your relationship.

Accept the truth; When he tells you what you what to wear, it’s not because you don’t know your own style – it’s because he wants to have full control of your life.

6. Make it a Point To Always Dress for Yourself

When you start dressing for others, it signifies that you are doing something wrong. It is sometimes important to have people’s opinions, but this should not dictate how you style yourself and live your life.

When you don’t feel confident about yourself, worrying about what people are going to say about your dress, it is an indication that you are suffering from low self-esteem.

Sometimes it’s fun to dress up for your guy, but you don’t want to go too far and start stressing out.

Many of us have to deal with a partner who wants to control the way we style ourselves. To effective deal with such people, it important for you to first understand yourself and understand why you style yourself the way you do.

You know best what looks good and what doesn’t look good on you. If you are not confident about your choice of dressing, then your low confidence level will help your partner control all other aspects of your life as well.

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