How to Date Someone Who Works Nights

All of us want our relationships to be happy, healthy, meaningful, and satisfying. And to have this type of relationship, you need –

– Good physical and emotional intimacy.

– Spending a great time together and creating lasting memories.

– Having deep knowledge and understanding of each other.

– Understanding each other’s concerns and helping them get through tough times.

– Encouraging your partner to be the best version of themselves.

– Improving compatibility and finding a quick and meaningful resolution to every big and small issue in the relationship.

But, when you are dating someone who works the night shift, things can be a bit tough. Forget about arranging dates, sometimes, it becomes a big challenge to even sit for a meal together. When someone works night shifts, they usually stay exhausted during the daytime. This makes it really difficult for you to have something meaningful with them. Below are some of the problems you are likely to face-

Less Together time – You feel lonely because when you are working, your partner is free, and when you are free, he’s at work. This gives you significantly less time together.

Most of your conversations are through the phone – Although you are not living in a long-distance relationship, it often feels like one. Because of your different job timings, you hardly get any time to talk face to face.

Can’t go out on weekdays – You are at work during the daytime, and he’s at work at night, which makes it impossible for you to go out on weekdays.

But if you are really into each other and want to make things work, below are some powerful tips that can help you achieve this

Be creative in Planning Your dates

When your partner works at night, he’ll have to sleep during the day. In order to maintain a healthy relationship, you’ll have to put in some extra effort to make things smooth between the two of you. Be creative when it comes to planning your dates. Making minor adjustments can sometimes go a long way in keeping the spark alive in your relationship. If going at night is not possible, you can try planning dates for early morning or lunch.

If you are genuinely interested in each other, it doesn’t matter if you go out at night or day; things will eventually work out between the two of you.

Just go through your schedules and pick a slot when both of you are awake and available to go out for a date. You can

– Watch sunrise/sunset together

– Join gym/yoga class

– Go for a movie/play in the evenings

– Go out to a restaurant you love just before/after your shifts

You can do so many things based on your schedule and preferences; just make sure that you make that little extra effort to properly plan things. It’s not very easy to find a potential partner who checks all the boxes. It’s really difficult to find a partner whose beliefs perfectly align with yours. These beliefs could be related to – religion, lifestyle, children, politics, finances, etc. So, if you think that you’ve found ‘the one’, do not hesitate to make these minor adjustments.

2. Pay Special Attention to Physical Intimacy

When your partner works night shifts, it will be a bit challenging to maintain good physical intimacy with them. But, if you want things to last between the two of you, you will have to pay special attention to this aspect of your relationship. Good physical intimacy is key to a healthy relationship. When you are in close sensual proximity to your significant other, it helps strengthen your emotional connection with them.

Lack of intimacy can have a deep negative impact on your relationship. The abundance of intimacy, on the other hand, improves love, closeness, and affection. Not only it make you feel less distant, but it enables you to overcome any differences you may have with your partner.

Physical intimacy is all about holding hands, maintaining sensual eye contact, cuddling, and making love. When you have healthy levels of physical intimacy in a relationship, it plays a big role in reducing stress and strengthening the love between the two of you.

3. Take Full Advantage of Weekends and Holidays

It can sometimes be tough to go out on weekdays if your partner is working night shifts. Therefore, to keep the spark alive between the two of you, you need to make full use of weekends and holidays.

Plan something special and creative for the weekends. Go to your favorite restaurant or plan an activity that both of you like – hiking, going to a movie, a museum, beach, shopping etc.

Plan things in a way that is exciting for both of you. Be it your weekends or holidays, always try to make it special for your partner. When you put in honest effort for your relationship, it leads to refreshing experiences which create lasting memories that you’ll remember for years to come.

4. Encourage Your Partner to Get Good Sleep

If your partner is always sleep-deprived because of his night shifts, he’ll often stay exhausted. An exhausted person will always be in a bad mood. You’ll often see him getting frustrated and irritated over small things. This can spoil your whole relationship experience.

Getting good sleep helps us stay in a better mood. Respect his sleep schedule and allow him to get good sleep without any disturbance.

When you are in a relationship with someone who works on night shift, it is important that both of you are aware of each other’s sleep schedule. 

You and your partner should have clear knowledge about when both of you’ll be sleeping and when both of you’ll be awake.

Only when you are happy and healthy from within can you think about having a happy and healthy relationship. A person who is always exhausted will find it difficult to contribute anything to the relationship. When your partner is not contributing, your relationship with them will go off balance.

5. Stop Whining and Give Them More Affection

Maybe he feels guilty because he is not able to give more time to you and to the relationship. He feels sad that the two of you are not able to do things that other normal couples do. Don’t make him feel bad for things that are out of his control.

Rather than complaining, focus on giving him more love and affection. When you encourage and support your partner, it strengthens your bond with him.

6. Try Making Adjustments to Your Own Sleeping Schedule

This is hard and easier said than done. But, if your circumstance allows you to make a small adjustment to your sleeping schedule so that you can see them more, then you must go for it. To make a relationship successful, it is important to make small healthy compromises every now and then.

When you make these compromises, it sends across a message that you want to make things work between you and your partner. Making these small compromises also encourage your partner to do the same.

7. Send Texts More Frequently

When your partner is working his night shifts, it will be a good idea to send them texts just to check-in. Send loving messages when they are at work. Doing this lets your partner know how much you love and care for them. It helps you improve your bonding with them.

Send them a message or two when they are working and ask how they’re doing. They may not respond, but they’ll appreciate you trying.

8. Plan Vacations

Going out on vacation with your partner helps you to recharge and connect with them at deeper levels. Plan a day trip or a weekend getaway with your partner. Night shifts can be physically and emotionally draining for both of you; having vacations together can bring back the balance in your relationship.

9. Try to Stay Present When You are With Them

Keep your phone aside and forget about everything else when you are with your significant other. You already do not get much time with each other; just staying in the same room with them is not going to cut it. You’ll have to do more.

Remove all the distractions, stay in the present and live the moment. Speak with them and focus on having better physical and emotional intimacy with them.



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