You dated a nice guy; he was into you, understood you, and always had time for you. It always seemed like he was ‘the one.’
You started getting so excited that he got uncomfortable. Things got really awkward, and he pulled away from you.
Maybe you acted too needy, sent him non-stop texts, pressured him to spend more time with you, or tried to take things too fast.
He started feeling overwhelmed with all this and decided to call it quits.
If you feel like your crazy behavior has pushed him away, it’ll probably make you feel more frustrated as you don’t know how to fix things.
It’s natural to feel confused and lost at times like these.
When you are really into somebody, it can sometimes feel like you need them more than they need you. Strong emotions can take over and show up in strange ways.
If you want to fix things, below are some effective ways to get your ex-boyfriend back after acting crazy with him –
1. Improve Yourself
Now that you are not together, it is the perfect time to go over things that led to big problems in your relationship.
Try to figure out what went wrong. You must try and figure out the cause of the problem. Think about what you could have done better; think about the things that you wish you would have said or done earlier.
It is hard to have a good relationship with your partner if you don’t have a good relationship with yourself.
When you have a negative relationship with yourself, it can make you emotionally dependent on others. Apart from making you feel jealous, frustrated, needy, and crazy, it will have big negative impacts on your relationship and weaken your bond with your romantic partner.
To have a meaningful relationship, you must focus on first improving yourself. When you try to become a better version of yourself, it will help you become more confident and happier.
Your warm, positive and friendly personality will make you more appealing in the eyes of people close to you. On the contrary, if you don’t work on improving yourself, you will start projecting negative vibes that will push people away from you.
It is important to remember that you can’t change the past. Thinking about what went wrong and getting angry over it will not do any good. Instead, focus on learning from your past mistake.
If you think you were too needy with your partner, try to learn how to be happy without being dependent upon anyone.
If you think you were lazy and were not putting in much effort into the relationship, learn about how you can improve on this aspect of your personality.
2. Be Patient
Time heals all wounds – it’s a cliche, but it’s true. As time goes by, you will gain distance as well as perspective.
When you look at things from a distance, you start to see things for what they are.
It also gives you a better perspective that allows you to see some of the reasons why things went bad. This knowledge is very important as it can help you heal and guide your future relationships.
Breakups are hard; they can take a toll on your emotional health. It is important to take some time for yourself – lie low, rest, and refuel during this time.
If you plan to get back together with him, it is important for you to feel your 100% emotionally and physically.
It is always a good idea to take some time to assess the situation after breaking up before getting back together. There is always a chance that even if you do get back together, similar problems might come up again, leading to another breakup in the future.
3. Do You Really Want Him Back
When you break up with your partner, they often stay on your mind and evoke a number of different emotions.
When the relationship ends, you may find yourself feeling mixed emotions; it is normal to second guess your decision and wish things between you weren’t not over. You may feel relieved, sad, or even regretful. These emotions will eventually fade, but it won’t be anytime soon.
You must try to find out if you want to be together with him again. Do you believe that you can have a lasting and meaningful relationship with him?
As you have spent a lot of time with him, you probably know a lot about him, ask your self – are you confident that you both are compatible with each other?
It is entirely possible that you weren’t doing anything particularly crazy out there, maybe you were just being you, but he couldn’t handle it.
In theory, rekindling your past relationship with your ex is never a bad idea. But you should always take the opinions of your mates into consideration beforehand. It might help to save yourself from another nasty breakup.
4. Have Open and Honest Conversations
Communication is key to a healthy and meaningful relationship. When you have problems as a couple, you need to find solutions for them as a couple. There is no point arguing and fighting about issues from the past; you can’t undo things you have already done or unsay things that you have already said.
Focus on acknowledging the mistakes that have been made in the past and learning from them.
5. Identify Your Triggers
Try to analyze why you acted crazy; focus on identifying those triggers.
When he was trying to get too close and personal with you, it might have made you uncomfortable; your immediate reaction may have been to push him away. It’s not that you didn’t want him close, but it might have made him feel rejected or that something was wrong between you two.
Whatever your triggers may be, Now, after spending some time away from him, you have the opportunity to learn more about yourself and your triggers.
6. Give Some Thought On your Own Behaviour
Did he break up with you because you were too clingy, needy, or crazy?
It would help if you tried to reflect on some of your mistakes.
There is a possibility that you are being clingy because you like to be close to the people you care about.
Maybe it’s normal for you, but others might have a different opinion about it.
Try to find answers to questions like – Why do you get so angry when he forgets to text or call you? Why does it hurt so much when he doesn’t include you in his weekend plans?
Are there any trust issues? Do you have any doubts about his love for you? Do you feel insecure with him? Getting honest answers to these questions will help you bring more clarity.
7. Minimize Contact
When you are apart from each other, try to have no contact with him.
Stop tracking him on social media and stop asking about what he is upto from your common friends.
Allow him to miss you; if he wants to get in touch, he will find a way.
Having minimum contact with him will help you put your thoughts together in a clearer way. This will allow you to be more independent, which will further help you form healthier relationships in the future.
8. When You Get in Touch With Him Again, Try to See Things From His Point of View
Give him patient listening, get his perspective on your behavior and actions.
You may have great logic and good intentions about getting back together, but there is a probability that he might see this as an invasion of his privacy.
Remember, he can read your intentions only through your actions.
This is the reason why you need to be more empathetic when trying to resolve conflicts like this. When you start taking his perspective into consideration, it will help you in strengthening your prospective relationship with him.
9. Don’t Beg Him to Stay
If you are deeply in love with him, it will be difficult for you to let him go. But at the same time, it is very important for you to accept the reality. Begging or pleading him to stay is only going to make things worse.
Even if you manage to make him stay this way, the relationship will lose its charm; it will not be as exciting and meaningful as before.
There is no problem in letting him know that you are interested in getting back together, but you should not appear too desperate, dependent, or needy to him.
10. Love Yourself For Who You Are
Be kind to yourself by accepting the decisions you made. Never depend on anyone else to validate who you are or what goes on in your life. Don’t get caught up in relying on him to make yourself happy.
Accept yourself the way you are. When you are unhappy from within, it will be difficult for you to have a happy relationship with someone else.
