Once the initial infatuation stage of the relationship is over, it gets challenging for couples to keep the spark alive. You get so involved with your daily schedules that being romantic with your partner becomes a low priority. This is especially when your boyfriend is not very expressive.
If you want your boyfriend to be more romantic, you must have strong emotional and physical intimacy with him. The lack of romance in your relationship can negatively affect your connection with your boyfriend.
You might still love him, but if the romance dies down and he is no longer romantic towards you, then you will lose interest in him. The relationship will feel boring and uninteresting too.
Even when you put a lot of effort into keeping the spark alive, his unromantic personality can make it hard for you to feel “in love” with him.
It is not too much to ask your partner to be more romantic in a relationship. A romantic boyfriend will give you the respect, love, acceptance, and appreciation you deserve. He will often find ways to make you feel special and attractive.
These small efforts add a lot of strength to your relationship. In the long run, the absence of these efforts can make you fall out of love with him. The lack of romance in the relationship may make you feel like he is taking you for granted.
How to encourage your boyfriend to be more romantic?
1. Open Up With Him
It’s better not to ask your partner for romantic gestures like bringing you gifts on special days or taking you out for a romantic dinner. Maybe when you ask, he’ll do what you want him to, but these gestures are unlikely to add more romance to your relationship.
You need to open up with him about the core problems in your relationship. Let him know how his lack of romance is affecting this relationship. Control your temptation to confront or blame him, and figure out ways to discuss this topic in a non-confrontational way.
Maybe he will defend himself by saying that he has a different love language. He’ll tell you that he has his own ways of expressing love. When building a strong emotional connection with your partner, being on the same page with him is very important.
He may not understand romance the same way you do – and that’s all right. A partner who enjoys extravagance might treat you to dinner at a fancy restaurant on every birthday or anniversary, while all you really want is an increased level of availability.
To have better emotional intimacy, both of you need to accept and recognize each other’s love language and how he likes to express emotional support. It would also be good if the two of you could get on the same page regarding romance.
2. Plan Activities Together
Romance has to be much more than a simple date night. You’ll have to plan much more than date nights to keep the spark alive in your relationship. Try to bring back the excitement you used to have in the initial dating days.
Your activities together don’t necessarily have to be expensive or extensive. Focus on keeping your dates less expensive and easy to do. Find out activities that both you and he enjoy doing – Movies, hiking, picnic at the park, visiting museums, or short vacations.
When dates are less expensive and with less pressure, you both will feel encouraged to plan more of them.
3. Lead The Way
Sometimes you have to take the lead to bring back the spark and create a romantic vibe in your relationship. Making small efforts like – having a candlelight dinner at home, engaging in interesting conversation before sleeping, playing a game that both of you enjoy, listening to music, or watching your favorite movies can go a long way in encouraging your boyfriend to be more romantic with you.
Ask him about his day, send flirty messages, and he will feel compelled to do the same with you.
4. Make Efforts To Look Good
When you look good, you feel more confident about yourself; it reminds you that you are a great catch.
This is not just a myth. When you dress up for your partner, it encourages him to be more romantic with you. It is a psychological phenomenon that men are likelier to make an effort when they see their partner dressed up.
5. Improve Your Emotional Intimacy With Him
Saying I love you a day does not keep the break up away. It’s good to say I love you to your boyfriend now and then, but it’s not enough to keep the spark alive in your relationship.
Find ways to improve your emotional intimacy with him; expressing emotions of love, appreciation, acceptance, gratitude, and admiration helps strengthen your bond with your partner.
Let him know how much you care for him and how much you appreciate the effort that you put in for the relationship. Try not to fight with him over smaller issues and accept the way he is.
6. Love Him The Way He Wants To Be Loved
Perhaps he has a different love language. For some people, acts of service are more valuable than verbal expressions of love. If your boyfriend falls into this category, you can try helping him with chores he don’t like to do, such as laundry, house-cleaning, etc.
If he relishes spending quality time with you, plan regular dates together. If he likes getting gifts, give him something meaningful on special days. The important thing for you is to understand what makes him feel loved. Even if putting efforts to make him feel loved puts you out of your comfort zone, you should not hesitate.
7. Do Things That You Want Your Partner To Do
Rather than waiting for him to be more romantic with you, it’s best to put in your efforts. When you want him to be more romantic, be more romantic with him first.
When you constantly appreciate and compliment him, make the first move to establish physical intimacy, bring him flowers and plan special surprises, soon he will feel compelled to do the same to you.
If you want him to value you more, start asking about his day, make him feel heard, help him get over his stresses, and pay more attention to him and soon, he will start reciprocating.
8. Improve Communication
When you have poor Communication in your relationship, it can cause him to lose interest in you. It is important to have deep, meaningful conversations with your partner now and then. This helps you to connect with your boyfriend at a deeper level.
Find time to sit with him and ask how he has been feeling. Encourage him to open up with you at deeper levels. Ask him about his expectations from you. You may start by asking – “what can I do to make this relationship even better for both of us.”
9. Keep Impressing Him
Spend time on him to make him feel special, even if you need to go the extra mile. It will help renew your ailing relationship and make you feel great about it.
10. Improve Physical Intimacy
When you have been with him for a long time, physical intimacy becomes predictable and more like a routine (goodbye kiss, sex on special days or weekends, etc.). To avoid things from getting monotonous, you can try introducing physical touch at unexpected times.
Give him a good kiss when he returns home from work, when you’re watching something on tv or when cooking. These small efforts go a long way in encouraging your boyfriend to be more romantic with you.
11. Do Not Hesitate To Make Small Compromises For Him
Having dinner at a restaurant he likes (but you hate), Happily going to a movie he likes but hates, Having him have his say on small household decisions.
When you offer to do things that he loves but you hate, it helps to reinforce the feeling of love and togetherness in his mind. It makes him feel compelled to make the same compromises for you and encourages him to be more romantic in the relationship.