Q: “I’ve been dating this guy for the past eight months, and he is great. The only problem is, that he never wants to go out. Either we stay in my apartment, or I go to his place. We live in one of the coolest neighborhoods in town, and there are all sorts of fun things going on all the time, but he only wants to stay in.
He doesn’t do anything for me. I just want to be seen and appreciated by him. All I want from him is to take me out to dinner and treat me nicely.
I’ve told him how I feel, but it doesn’t change anything. He always has some excuse, like he’s busy with someone else or not feeling well. Whenever I take up this issue with him, he gets irritated and starts becoming defensive.
I get that going out in public is not something compulsory. But I’m proud of my boyfriend and want the world to know I am dating a great guy. Is it wrong to expect him to feel the same way?
I know that he genuinely loves and care about me, but at the same time, I fail to figure out why he won’t take me out. Am I not worth his time or money?
Is it a bad sign for my relationship? I don’t want him to see me as a naggy or a clingy girlfriend, but what should I do to make him understand how important this is to me? “
It’s natural for you to feel frustrated when your partner never takes you out on dates.
Companionship in a relationship is essential for your physical and mental wellbeing. It’s essential for a healthy relationship that sometimes your partner takes you out.
By ignoring your needs, he is acting selfishly. You need to convey your feelings to him and let him know how important these things are to you.
If he is adamant about not going out with you, it is a big red flag for your relationship. His behavior will often make you feel that your relationship has run out of steam. This is disappointing, especially because your relationship is only a few months old.
As with any new relationship, the start is often the best time. You make memories that you’ll remember for a lifetime – some good and some bad, but they’re all important & make your story what it is. It’s normal for Couples to often disagree on things in budding relationships. But if he refuses to go out in these initial days with you knowing how much it means to you, signs are that the two of you won’t get along.
There are lots of different styles in relationships – some prefer to stay in all the time, while others like to go out. For example, some people really enjoy going on long walks or evening trips to the cinema or restaurants. Some couples also have different lifestyles and are perfectly content with staying home.
The important thing to note is that when it comes to relationship styles, it should be a mutual agreement. If your partner ignores your needs and desires just to get things done his way, this can have negative effects on the relationship.
If you keep on feeling unhappy and he’s being stubborn about it, it might be time to end the relationship.
My Boyfriend Often Goes Out with His Friends But Never Takes Me Out
It’s totally normal to feel a little bummed out if your partner is always hanging with their friends and never takes you out.
You always ask yourself, “Why is he always interested in hanging out with his friend and not me?”
You often get a feeling that he doesn’t care about your needs and desires and it makes you feel like you aren’t important to him.
Below are some tips to help you fix this situation.
1. Flattery
It is always a great feeling when your special someone makes you feel special and say nice things about you. It is wrong to believe that boys don’t need compliments. Everyone loves being desired and being flattered.
In relationships, what you seek from your special someone, they often want the same things from you.
There is a possibility that he likes going out with friends because you are not giving him the amount of attention he needs.
Maybe he got a lot of attention from his friends when he was single. Since he has been in this relationship with you, he is missing that attention. He wants to feel desired and wanted again. We are not saying that he is going to cheat on you, but when people desire your company, it serves as an ego boost for your mind.
2. Make him Fall in Love With You Again
It is not advisable to weaponize sex, but it’s also important to know that science has proven that sex can act as a motivator for most men.
It will be wrong to say that all men are crazy about sex, but the truth remains that plenty of them are.
This is one of those areas where you have an advantage over his friends.
Many people complain that as the relationship ages, romance starts to diminish, and intimacy slowly fades away.
All you have to do is inject that passion back into your relationship.
3. Ask Him to Take You Out More Often
It may sound a bit obvious, but have you asked your guy to take you out?
We agree that in a perfect relationship, you shouldn’t have to do much convincing to get your guy to do the right thing. But not all men are like this, and sometimes they need your guidance to take things in the right direction.
In a relationship, it is often said that if you want something from your partner, the best way is to ask him directly.
There is often no requirement for elaborate and high voltage conversation; all you have to do is make small suggestions.
For instance, you can say – It’s been really long since we went on a real date. Let’s do something special this weekend.
If your partner wants to spend all their time with their friends, you need to try and put some effort in before it’s too late.
Maybe your partner doesn’t know how you feel right now, and they’re just waiting for you to take the lead. You should maybe try suggesting some initiatives together, so they know what to do next.
Letting him know how much you value his company will not only make him feel special, but he may also feel encouraged to spend more time with you.
In relationships, many a time, using simple approaches can help you resolve even the toughest situations.
4. Try to Understand His Love Language
Knowing your partner’s love language is all about understanding how he expresses his love and affection for you.
All of us have our own ways of showing love to our partners. When your partner misinterprets your love language or when they fail to reciprocate love in a way you want them to, it negatively impacts the emotional intimacy between the two of you.
For example – Some people enjoy getting flowers and cakes from their partners, while others would rather have their partner focus on spending more time with them.
When you’re in a relationship, it’s important to understand how your partner expresses feelings. This helps you to improve your understanding with your partner and really get to know them. Also, being able to share love in ways that your partner will enjoy will make you feel close together.
5. Try Not Coming Across as a Pushover
When we are trying to be a great partner to our special someone, we try to give them more love, attention, and respect. While doing this, it is natural for us to expect our partner to reciprocate the same feelings.
Setting up boundaries within a relationship is very important. The absence of boundaries may make your partner feel entitled to your time and attention.
Suppose you want your relationship to stay healthy and meaningful. In that case, it is important for you to feel loved and respected by your partner.
If you see your partner always putting his and his friend’s needs above yours, it is a sign that your relationship is going in the wrong direction.
When he never takes you out and spends weekends with his friends, he is not giving you the love and attention you deserve.
When your partner fails to treat you the way you deserve to be treated, you must take a stand for yourself. Behaving like a people pleaser in a situation like this will make the situation even more worse for you.
