When your partner embarrasses you in social situations, it can make life very difficult for you. It is a terrible situation when the person you love disrespects or embarrasses you in front of other people.
“My husband is a great guy, genuinely caring, and loves me. We have had so many great adventures together. But when we’re socializing with friends or family, he acts differently – sometimes making rude jokes or being inappropriate in conversations.
My friend, who was 39 years old, was getting married to her 32-year-old partner. In front of everyone, my husband asked her how many men she had been with before finding ‘the one.’
He is really great with me, but it becomes very frustrating for me when he embarrasses me in front of everyone.”
When He Goes Too Far
Some men don’t realize when they are going too far with their jokes. When women say that their husband embarrasses them in social situations, it could mean –
– He says or does stupid things in front of her friends ( or acts like a jerk)
– Asks uncomfortable questions or discusses uncomfortable topics in a social situation
– Have poor dressing sense and lack table manners
– Doesn’t speak or talk too much
– Makes crude jokes
– Makes fun of her friends or close relatives
Some men are really good when they are with their family. But when you take them out in social situations, they either don’t speak or talk rudely.
In relationships, it is not unusual for one partner to feel embarrassed by what the other partner has said or done. When it happens occasionally, there is nothing to worry about. Every one of us is different, and we make mistakes all the time. It is normal to have a disagreement or small fight with your romantic partner every now and then. But, if your partner constantly embarrasses you in social situations, it is a big red flag for your relationship.
When a relationship is faced with a constant onslaught of situations like this, it will have an adverse effect on it. In the end, you are likely to end up fighting more often and having more disagreements about little things.
The tension that the repeated incidents have on the relationship can result in a lot of resentment built up over time.
It is Important To Address These Issues Before it’s Too Late
It’s important for both partners in a relationship to try and understand each other’s concerns. You must convey to him how embarrassed you feel when he acts like a jerk in social situations. Tell him how it has changed the way you think about him.
When you have raised your concerns with him, and he refuses to change, it means he does not value you. He does not respect or appreciate all that you do for him.
It is often said that when you are in a serious relationship, both you are your partner represent each other. So, when your husband or boyfriend does embarrassing things in social situations, it is natural for you to feel disappointed by it.
You feel that his behavior makes you lose your hard-earned respect and dignity in front of your friends.
When he is out there doing and saying stupid things, you feel that things are out of your control. The fact that you don’t know what he is going to do next gives you a lot of anxiety. You feel anxious thinking about what he is going to do today and how bad is it going to be.
Everyone wants to be socially acceptable, but when he acts in stupid ways in front of friends and families, it makes you look weird. You feel worried that people will start making fun of him behind his back, and it is going to negatively impact your social life as a couple.
When your husband constantly embarrasses you in social situations, it could be because of one of the following reasons-
He Feels the Need to Isolate You Socially
It is a form of emotional abuse. He does not want you to have any form of rewarding interactions with the outside world.
Things are usually fun and exciting when you get into a new relationship with someone new. As time progresses, you will get to know each other better. You start to grow into each other’s life. The relationship soon moves into a stage where you will meet each other’s friends and families. If things are going well, your life starts to feel more rewarding and meaningful.
But when you are in a relationship with a toxic person, he may often feel the need to socially isolate you. You’ll notice that he wants you to be with him all the time. He’ll have strong objections when you want to spend time with your friends or family. You will find it difficult to convince him to give you some space.
Doesn’t matter how much you request; he will refuse every time you ask him to go out in a social situation. Even if you manage to convince him to go out with you, he’ll either behave rudely or will do or say things that embarrass you.
He Has Bad Social Skills
There are two possibilities here – either your partner is socially awkward, or he is not as naturally social as you are. Sometimes these are like other small issues in the relationship – they exist but still do not affect your relationship with him. But, in some cases, these issues become so big that they start threatening the existence of your relationship. Therefore, it becomes very important for you to address these issues before they go out of control.
There is a big difference between these two scenarios – being socially awkward and being less social. It is an objective problem if he is bad at socializing with others. If he is socially awkward, it is an issue of compatibility, personality styles, and preferences.
Suppose you are going through something like this. In that case, you’ll need to focus on two priorities – (i) – Work on improving his social skills – (ii) – Work on improving the compatibility between the two of you.
Unresolved Family Conflicts
People with a rough family life often have marginally lower social skills. Negative experiences as a child can have lasting effects on your ability to interact socially with people. Childhood trauma can create a general feeling of inadequacy and low self-confidence.
It is possible that your husband had a difficult childhood which may be making it difficult for him to get along with people. This may be why he is often rude and insensitive in social situations, which can make things more challenging for him than you think. People who suffer from a lack of social acceptance often lead disappointing lives.
Suppose his parents were rejecting or extremely controlling. In that case, this can have a strong and lasting effect on how he behaves with you and with others in social situations.
As a partner, instead of blaming him, you should try to encourage him to open up with you. You should appreciate and encourage him when he tries to improve his social skills and behave better in social situations.
You should always keep in mind that maybe they are not able to realize how their behavior is hurting you. Conveying your feelings honestly and offering to work together with him to overcome these issues can help you strengthen your bond with him.
In situations like these, taking professional help from an expert therapist can make life a lot easier for both of you.
When you have tried everything, and he continues to embarrass or disrespect you, it is a clear sign that he doesn’t like you and is incapable of giving you the love and respect you deserve.
It is sometimes difficult to control your partner, but you always have the option to control your behavior. Act smartly and politely tell him that if he continues to behave like this, you will have to end this relationship with him.
If you genuinely love and care for him, and believe that you can have a strong and lasting relationship with him, then there is no harm in giving him more time. Instead of asking him to improve his behavior, you should focus more on inspiring him to become a better person.